Everybody poops—no shocker there. However, some of us have strong preferences and quirky habits regarding when or where we do our business.
A recent bathroom emergency of my own sparked a fun debate among friends on this very topic. As we wandered the city, desperately searching for a public restroom, we started discussing our, uh, toilet tendencies. Somewhere along the way, we developed a theory: There are two types of poopers in this world.
First, you’ve got the ones who go at the same time every day like clockwork—let’s call them time-based or “temporal poopers.” Whether the urge strikes, say, first thing in the morning, after dinner, or both, that’s your only window. Then there are “locational poopers.” What matters more than when they do their business is where—and for understandable reasons, it’s probably at home. Anywhere else—a communal office bathroom, your friend’s pristine apartment, a teeny restaurant stall—is a no-go.
I was curious if this theory held any weight, which is why I posed the question to the experts. Turns out, pooping is way more personal than we often realize, Benjamin Levy, MD, a gastroenterologist and clinical associate of medicine at the University of Chicago, tells SELF. After reading this, for instance, maybe you instantly know which one you are (I’m a temporal pooper, through and through). It’s also common to relate to both—like, you can only go at home and more specifically, after your morning coffee. Or maybe time and place are irrelevant, and you’re blessed (cursed?) with pure, cha